Dear time, You clearly ignored my last letter to you as you are flying past very quickly as usual. Please, pretty please, could we have a little bit of a slow down? If slowing down is not an option, an extra hour in the day would be a good start, but the perfect solution would be an extra day in the week (a non-work day naturally). Any chance?
Dear local people, Batten down those hatches, stock up on plenty of supplies, abandon all hope of a quiet afternoon sitting in the garden with only the sound of birdsong for company… The school holidays begin today and the little blighters will be everywhere.
Dear airports, I have heard that today will be the busiest day of the year for travel. I hope it all goes well for you.
Dear TV drama The Loch, Well, that was six hours I won’t be getting back. I stuck with you because I kept hoping you would improve, but sadly you didn’t, although perhaps the last episode was actually quite dramatic in some places. I had high hopes for you, being set in the dramatic Scottish countryside, but sadly I was bitterly disappointed. The writing was poor, the characters were unbelievable, there were shoals of red herrings rather than just the odd one, the logic of the tale had huge holes in it and the story was just too preposterous. If there is a second series (surely not) I won’t be watching, even if the scenery is beautiful.
Dear foxes, I haven’t seen you in the garden for ages – what’s happened?
Dear all, Have a good day.